At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize