i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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