think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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