i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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