Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
