Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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