Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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