so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
