I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
