Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
