if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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