is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize