quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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