ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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