please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
When are your genitals available?
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
