gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
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