please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
