now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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