Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
