It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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