I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
