i think my mom watched the whole time
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
