My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
