Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize
