I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize