guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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