is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize