I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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