tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize