Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Randomize
