what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
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