he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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