New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
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