Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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