if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
HIV tests are more positive than that guy
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
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