everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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