WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
