i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
