Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i think i have two assholes
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
