ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
