dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Shame - the story of my life.
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