I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize