ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
