i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
