I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Randomize