True but thats because hes a fetus.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Im part way to drunk.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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