I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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