The best revenge is premature balding
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I just forgot I was standing up.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
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