the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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