Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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