Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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